some of the exhibitors
I booked for several workshops and invited hubby along. I should have known that it was such a bad idea. The first workshop was a small group, and the facilitator encouraged everyone to introduce themselves and provide the reason for signing up. When it was hubby’s turn (he was the only male member in the group!), he just plainly said “hi, I am........I work as.........I have nothing to do with this workshop except to accompany my wife!”. All the ladies (especially the British) looked at me and chuckled “oooooohhhhh" (in their sweet voices). I guess this was my cue to introduce myself. It was absolutely embarassing! Understandably, hubby did not join me in the other workshops.
The conference was a good venue to meet people from the industry who readily explained the type of work they have been doing. Some of the workshop presentations was not really new to me, in fact the Philippine scenario can boast some of its best practices. I was also quite familiar with the companies who presented as I have handled some projects for them in the past. At the back of my mind, I was telling myself “ I could do her (the presenter) job!”. However, finding these very much coveted positions here in the Netherlands is another story. Unfortunately, these type of jobs are not really advertised and require a lot of networking. Sigh.
What I observed from the conference was the absence of DIVERSITY. Perhaps because the focus was very much into Europe, but nevertheless it gave me the impression that it was a very Caucasian-led community. During the workshops, I would always end up being the only COLOURED person in the group. Somehow, I felt quite out of place (you know the look of: what is an Asian doing here?) but on the other hand, once I started sharing my experiences to the group, it perfectly felt right to be there.
I must admit that I left the conference a little bit confused, but at the same time reassured that my skills can certainly be put to use here. The challenge is simply to find WHO will appreciate it or WHO will give me the opportunity to use it. I also have to start focusing on what I really WANT to pursue.
If I were to look at the current job market and be pragmatic about it, I could consider doing the work I was initially trained for. However, if I have to be honest to myself--I no longer find fulfillment in crunching numbers, predicting future cash flows to achieve the desirable IRR or simply developing high financed projects that would give me sleepless nights. I quit doing this job primarily because I was less fulfilled and just got tired of it. The only reason it took me time to give it up was because of the benefits and the security attached to it. Nevertheless after reaping the financial gains, I was back to my old disillussioned self. Alternatively, nothing is put to waste as I could still make use of my skills given the trend for socially responsible investing.
A few years ago, I made the leap to explore the other side of the corporate world and was very much happy with my decision. I can't believe that I am facing the same dilemma just because I have no foothold in the Netherlands job market. Should I still pursue the job leads that I know that I am fully qualified to do knowing that my real passion is elsewhere? Obviously, I just want to be able to work again to a certain degree that I am tempted to compromise passion for availability or practicality. These are some of the choices that I have to make.
After the conference, hubby and I went to the centrum of Maastricht to enjoy what the city has to offer. Over dinner, hubby reassured me that the most important thing for him is for me to be happy with anything I do, it doesn’t matter he said, if this will mean taking a lot more time to look for it. With that said, I just simply enjoyed my dinner and my hubby’s company.
11 November 2004
Starting All Over
Hubby took the day off last Tuesday to drive me to Maastricht to attend the conference. What a luxury! To be honest, I wasn’t really looking forward to attend the conference on my own, so it was a nice surprise that hubby joined me.
some of the exhibitors
I booked for several workshops and invited hubby along. I should have known that it was such a bad idea. The first workshop was a small group, and the facilitator encouraged everyone to introduce themselves and provide the reason for signing up. When it was hubby’s turn (he was the only male member in the group!), he just plainly said “hi, I am........I work as.........I have nothing to do with this workshop except to accompany my wife!”. All the ladies (especially the British) looked at me and chuckled “oooooohhhhh" (in their sweet voices). I guess this was my cue to introduce myself. It was absolutely embarassing! Understandably, hubby did not join me in the other workshops.
The conference was a good venue to meet people from the industry who readily explained the type of work they have been doing. Some of the workshop presentations was not really new to me, in fact the Philippine scenario can boast some of its best practices. I was also quite familiar with the companies who presented as I have handled some projects for them in the past. At the back of my mind, I was telling myself “ I could do her (the presenter) job!”. However, finding these very much coveted positions here in the Netherlands is another story. Unfortunately, these type of jobs are not really advertised and require a lot of networking. Sigh.
What I observed from the conference was the absence of DIVERSITY. Perhaps because the focus was very much into Europe, but nevertheless it gave me the impression that it was a very Caucasian-led community. During the workshops, I would always end up being the only COLOURED person in the group. Somehow, I felt quite out of place (you know the look of: what is an Asian doing here?) but on the other hand, once I started sharing my experiences to the group, it perfectly felt right to be there.
I must admit that I left the conference a little bit confused, but at the same time reassured that my skills can certainly be put to use here. The challenge is simply to find WHO will appreciate it or WHO will give me the opportunity to use it. I also have to start focusing on what I really WANT to pursue.
If I were to look at the current job market and be pragmatic about it, I could consider doing the work I was initially trained for. However, if I have to be honest to myself--I no longer find fulfillment in crunching numbers, predicting future cash flows to achieve the desirable IRR or simply developing high financed projects that would give me sleepless nights. I quit doing this job primarily because I was less fulfilled and just got tired of it. The only reason it took me time to give it up was because of the benefits and the security attached to it. Nevertheless after reaping the financial gains, I was back to my old disillussioned self. Alternatively, nothing is put to waste as I could still make use of my skills given the trend for socially responsible investing.
A few years ago, I made the leap to explore the other side of the corporate world and was very much happy with my decision. I can't believe that I am facing the same dilemma just because I have no foothold in the Netherlands job market. Should I still pursue the job leads that I know that I am fully qualified to do knowing that my real passion is elsewhere? Obviously, I just want to be able to work again to a certain degree that I am tempted to compromise passion for availability or practicality. These are some of the choices that I have to make.
After the conference, hubby and I went to the centrum of Maastricht to enjoy what the city has to offer. Over dinner, hubby reassured me that the most important thing for him is for me to be happy with anything I do, it doesn’t matter he said, if this will mean taking a lot more time to look for it. With that said, I just simply enjoyed my dinner and my hubby’s company.
some of the exhibitors
I booked for several workshops and invited hubby along. I should have known that it was such a bad idea. The first workshop was a small group, and the facilitator encouraged everyone to introduce themselves and provide the reason for signing up. When it was hubby’s turn (he was the only male member in the group!), he just plainly said “hi, I am........I work as.........I have nothing to do with this workshop except to accompany my wife!”. All the ladies (especially the British) looked at me and chuckled “oooooohhhhh" (in their sweet voices). I guess this was my cue to introduce myself. It was absolutely embarassing! Understandably, hubby did not join me in the other workshops.
The conference was a good venue to meet people from the industry who readily explained the type of work they have been doing. Some of the workshop presentations was not really new to me, in fact the Philippine scenario can boast some of its best practices. I was also quite familiar with the companies who presented as I have handled some projects for them in the past. At the back of my mind, I was telling myself “ I could do her (the presenter) job!”. However, finding these very much coveted positions here in the Netherlands is another story. Unfortunately, these type of jobs are not really advertised and require a lot of networking. Sigh.
What I observed from the conference was the absence of DIVERSITY. Perhaps because the focus was very much into Europe, but nevertheless it gave me the impression that it was a very Caucasian-led community. During the workshops, I would always end up being the only COLOURED person in the group. Somehow, I felt quite out of place (you know the look of: what is an Asian doing here?) but on the other hand, once I started sharing my experiences to the group, it perfectly felt right to be there.
I must admit that I left the conference a little bit confused, but at the same time reassured that my skills can certainly be put to use here. The challenge is simply to find WHO will appreciate it or WHO will give me the opportunity to use it. I also have to start focusing on what I really WANT to pursue.
If I were to look at the current job market and be pragmatic about it, I could consider doing the work I was initially trained for. However, if I have to be honest to myself--I no longer find fulfillment in crunching numbers, predicting future cash flows to achieve the desirable IRR or simply developing high financed projects that would give me sleepless nights. I quit doing this job primarily because I was less fulfilled and just got tired of it. The only reason it took me time to give it up was because of the benefits and the security attached to it. Nevertheless after reaping the financial gains, I was back to my old disillussioned self. Alternatively, nothing is put to waste as I could still make use of my skills given the trend for socially responsible investing.
A few years ago, I made the leap to explore the other side of the corporate world and was very much happy with my decision. I can't believe that I am facing the same dilemma just because I have no foothold in the Netherlands job market. Should I still pursue the job leads that I know that I am fully qualified to do knowing that my real passion is elsewhere? Obviously, I just want to be able to work again to a certain degree that I am tempted to compromise passion for availability or practicality. These are some of the choices that I have to make.
After the conference, hubby and I went to the centrum of Maastricht to enjoy what the city has to offer. Over dinner, hubby reassured me that the most important thing for him is for me to be happy with anything I do, it doesn’t matter he said, if this will mean taking a lot more time to look for it. With that said, I just simply enjoyed my dinner and my hubby’s company.
5 comments:
Sige lang Sari..at least you have a very supportive husband..I also know that you'll find your nook pretty soon..so far going home to the Phils is your immediate plan so finish it off first and then say hello to the real world after that. Don't forget your swimsuit... Hope you're having a good weekend.
Sari, 'twas so sweet and thoughtful of your hubby to accompany you...
you're intelligent and talented, no doubt that you will soon find your nook and decide (with real choices) what you want to do (my past year really did not offer me with real choices as I was virtually immobile. That will change pretty soon but I am in no real hurry.)
Ting-Aling, thanks for the encouraging words. Have a good week :-)
Manang, thanks! Ikaw rin, I wish you all the best in your future medical career. I'm sure in due time you will also find something in Maine.
i have same observation as yours regarding lack of diversity thing. But, I am sure you will eventually land the work you want :).
Attending the conference is already the start of networking. Set your priorities right. While being busy looking for jobs, attend to your Dutch language course because we as immigrants coming from a not so developed land have duties to fulfill in this country (not to mention that immigrations is getting stricter!). That will keep you a bit busy on the side and hopefully will save your sanity. But I can totally relate... it´s like this everyday nagging feeling of: "What am I going to do in this freaking country? Should I start entertaining the idea of being a housewife?"
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